Doubts and fears are something that I deal with every single time I come out of my comfort zone. And I come out of my comfort zone A LOT.
Over the years I've realized that leaving the comfort zone ALWAYS brings up stuff, out of the shadows, and forcing it into the light so it can be seen. I've learned to see that as part of the joy of leaving the comfort zone: I'll get an opportunity to have another healing, another breakthrough.
Now I just made that sound real nice, right?
Well, LOL, here's how this REALLY LOOKS:
😁Wa hoo! I'm gonna do (this new thing that sounds fun but also totally scares me! I got this! I always have a breakthrough and can do anything! <==(That is after years of work, btw)
😫The panic begins. Here come the knots, the sadness, the fear, the anxiety. I expect them. But I'm NEVER "happy" to see them. It's always like, "Ugh. YOU. Again."
😥 I get out the journal and start writing, all the while wondering, "Wait, am I crazy? Am I just... I mean... can I do this? Do I really want to do this? I'm not crazy, right? No not crazy. Crazy people never wonder if they're crazy. Ok so what? What's coming up? What's the belief? What's going on here?
🧐Wow ok--now this is super interesting. (enter: sadness, overwhelm, frustration) Where is this stuff showing up? Wow, this is incredible. I believe that?? Why?
🧐🧐🧐🧐More and more detecting, infused with emotional catharsis, sometimes 5 hours of crying 😂 that leaves eyes puffy for 2 days, sometimes fits of anger, sometimes just a big sigh of relief...
😮Wow...OMG, thank god I can see it, thank god I can see it, what a blessing, OMG (because now it's not running me from the shadows anymore and I can deal with it, and every time I apply awareness--whatever it is goes from being a huge liability to an integrated asset that helps me in some huge way.)
👭Calls someone to process what I've just seen--totally amazing
🦋 Now, ready to move with nothing in the way...until next time...
And so the healing goes.
I work on myself not only for my own healing and growth, but so I can be a model of what it looks like to give yourself loving attention as you move through life.
No one that has a life made up of truly conscious choices has it easy. It's work for all of us. But it's so worth it. There is no magic pill. Being a human, a real human being is complex. There's joy and pain. Light and dark. And everything in between.
I don't teach "getting there," I teach this. The ability to do THIS. To look, to manage, to be more aware. Knowing how to do the exploration and grow with not only yourself, but a little help from others, is the power position.
THAT IS WHAT MAKES YOU UNSTOPPABLE. 💖💖