Chances are, what you’ve been told to expect from life, and what it’s all about has become completely obsolete in the last 20-30 years.
If you’re close to or in your midlife point now, there’s very few role models that would have prepared you for what you’re experiencing now, because it’s something that’s hitting hard for YOUR generation. We’re facing a reality on a planet that is upgrading and evolving. Those of us that had big hair in the 80’s are going through something incredibly painful and intense, and if you don’t understand what’s happening and WHY it’s happening, you can feel like you’re just going crazy. (It’s got nothing to do with the big hair, just an unfortunate coincidence most of us share in common.)
Let’s start there. You are NOT going crazy.
You’re going SANE.
What’s happening now is that you’re experiencing what I call a “midlife awakening,” which can throw your whole identity into question. I’m not necessarily talking about a spiritual awakening, although that can be part of it. A spiritual awakening has so many different associations and definitions, because it’s undefinable across the board. I’ve heard people call themselves “awakened” because they had an experience on a mountaintop somewhere and felt or connected to the divine in a way that was life-shifting. That experience CAN lead to an awakening, but it doesn’t always. I know many people personally who claim to be awakened because of such an experience, but they’re still operating on many unconscious programs and have multiple filters that life is coming in through, so they don’t actually see things the way they really are.
That’s really all awakening is, or the other buzz word, “enlightenment” it’s having no more “filters” that block what’s real. You can see yourself, the world, the divine, the way it really is. Of course, when you can see things the way they really are, there’s no more reason to live in a place of fear. This is why living an awake life feels better. You can relax, because you don’t doubt yourself, your power, you trust the process of life, you’re expressed, and you have no need to resist what IS. You’re not afraid of your own subconscious or of your emotions. You’re not even afraid of your own ego, because consciousness makes it impossible for your fear-based ego to grab hold and pull you under into the land where everything looks shitty. Some enlightened people still say they have an ego, and it tries to pop up from time to time, but it can’t take hold of them anymore. That’s the power of awareness.
So you see, the midlife awakening can create a spiritual awakening, or vice versa. However, the awakening I’m talking about here is one wherein you find your very identity falling to pieces. You wake up and realize you don’t even know who you are. You become aware that you’ve been wearing masks or living just to please others or gain approval.
You realize that your drive for accomplishments is starting to wear thin because now you have a few, and lo and behold they didn’t “fill the void” or make you happy for very long. You realize that you’re stuck in a life you don’t really want anymore, but now you have a mortgage, maybe some kids to put through college, and each day you feel more and more trapped--and pissed off or depressed as a result. The thought of just running away has probably crossed your mind more than once.
Plus, you find yourself tired of living an unfulfilling existence just to pay the bills and impress people you’re not even sure you like all that much. And, the thought of being in this place years from now doing the same thing feels like the worst thing you can ever imagine. You’re aware that you’ve been on autopilot for so long, but now that you know, you don’t even know what to do with it all. You’re unplugging from your whole way that you’ve motivated yourself for years, and you haven’t plugged into anything new. You don’t feel like you have solid orientation in your life, so now you feel disoriented. Maybe even depressed, because you can’t tap into the fuel that usually gets you out of bed. You can see the hamster wheel that you’ve been running on, and you’re freakin’ exhausted.
It’s getting harder and harder to keep up appearances, and talking about this with your friends just brings up their crap, so they shut you down, or even worse: shame you for feeling this way. “You’ve got such a great life, you should be grateful!” or some such responses that make you feel like now you are not only having a tough time, but you have to hide it from everyone.
This is what’s different for our generation. In our parents time, generally people either didn’t feel this, or most certainly didn’t express it. You stayed married, kept your job, and you were happy to have a nice house and food on the table, and you didn’t complain. The generation before that went through wars, the great depression, and all kinds of things that made them save their pennies, and be grateful they have stuff. The point was to feel nice, safe, and secure. And that felt GOOD at the time. This generation then paved the way for a different kind of chaos to descend on the population.
Our generation hasn’t experienced those kinds of world wars or major economic crisis (other than the 2008 crash, of course) that took jobs, food, and basic survival needs from a HUGE portion of the population. Most of us have grown up with microwave ovens and cable TV, and never worried about our basic needs like food and shelter. That, of course, is causing a mass ascension to getting those higher needs met. We’re wanting love and belonging, self-esteem, and self-actualization. We’re the generation of self-help and talk shows and the explosion of the the internet. We’re the generation that’s transcended survival needs, and we’re moving towards meaning, fulfillment, and joy. We’re wanting to do more than just eat, sleep, and work. We want to explore our potential, venture into realms of consciousness, we want to go to space and learn about the cosmos. We’re becoming aware that we feel powerless and we want it to stop. We don’t want to be programmed and conditioned to be slaves to a system. We want to evolve, grow, discover and share our gifts. We’re the generation that’s paving the way for a world that’s more concerned with thriving than just simply surviving.
So here we are, in our 40’s or 50’s, having our survival needs met and wanting more. Because the population hasn’t caught up with this very natural stage in evolution, most people actually feel GUILTY about wanting more. Like we’re being self-indulgent, and we should just take our shit sandwich, put some mustard on it, and shut the fuck up. It’s understandable, because things are happening so quickly. I mean, each generation now is evolving faster than ever.
That’s happening because what life is telling us now is this:
In order to survive, we need you to wake up, share your gifts, realize your connection to everything around you, and stop shitting on the planet that is keeping you alive. It’s thriving, and not just simply surviving, that’s is the key to continue our ascension and not fall back into a planet that has no water, food, or clean air to breathe. Then, we devolve and go back to trying to find our next meal. We have technology now that can provide free energy, food for all and global abundance. We have that NOW. And the way we’re creating it is to get in touch with truth, our true nature as human beings, connect, collaborate, and work together.
What you’re experiencing is leading you to higher realms of awareness, and it’s as natural as anything else. Now, in this moment, I invite you to consciously shift your perspective on this time where you’re experiencing the desire to be more and to learn who you really ARE, as a time where SANITY, wholeness, and fulfillment are seeping into our collective consciousness and waking us UP from what has become a nightmare. If you’re feeling disoriented, unsatisfied, and disillusioned: well my dear, you are on TEAM EVOLUTION. You are one of the lucky ones. YOU are taking the red pill, jumping right into the rabbit hole, and creating a new reality. First, with you and your life, and then, spreading to others simply by your change in energy.
So… grab your self-help books. Go to that workshop. Study yourself, question everything. When you set an intention to be part of a world that makes sense, or if you simply want your life to feel better, either intention will lead you where you want to go. Chances are, you’ve already set this intention which has led you here, to shit feeling like it’s falling apart. Your false self and egoic motivations are drying up, and everything's going with it. The friends, maybe the job, maybe even the expensive house or car is being purged from your life, so you can make room for the things that really matter, and you’re less and less attached to the things that just… don’t.
Stay aware my friend. Be willing to be wrong about everything, including who you are and what you value. Be willing to be wrong about your the ways you feel limited, trapped, and powerless. Send a powerful request to the universe that you WANT to be wrong about all of it, that you’re willing to let go of the crap you don’t need, and you want to live in truth. Set an intention to move out of fear and into your natural need to self-actualize. Make truth your north star, stop arguing for your side and your point of view. Refuse to be one of the masses that’s stuck in a never-ending squabble and see both sides. Work on resolving old wounds and patterns in yourself. Validate your feelings. Practice compassion for yourself and others. Do some exploration into your real gifts and talents, and work on expressing them in every way you can… because it feels good to do so.
You’re becoming sane. You may have others who are still insane calling you crazy. You’re not crazy. And, as much as they’re fighting you on this, trust me, they WANT you to become sane. They WANT you to prove them wrong. They WANT you to defy those limits and show them through your EXAMPLE that new realities are possible. Listen to their soul and not their limits. When someone says “you’re crazy!” remember that what you’re hearing is NOT about you, it’s what they’re saying to themselves. They don’t believe it. Listen to that with your heart and send them love. Out loud, or in your thoughts, reply to the naysayers like this: “Thank you for trying to protect me. And the greatest gift I’ll give you is to go out and show you that YOU can have more, that you’re worth more than you think, and that the world is full of possibilities.”
That is the best gift you can ever give: be fiercely SANE in a world full of INSANITY. Don’t join them. Free them.